Overheard in Portland: “I have access to all this infrastructure and no one gives a fuck.”

Grendel’s Coffee House, Northeast Burnside Street | Portland, Oregon

12/11/2013 3:30 p.m.

Snippets from a poorly executed hard sell … I had trouble figuring out exactly what kind of “business” Guy 1 was trying to entice Guy 2 to invest in, but it had something to do with transporting fish. 


What’s your motivation for this? I don’t want to get too busy. I want to invest the time to make money but I want to do more complicated things.

For me, this is a great opportunity. I have access to all this infrastructure and no one gives a fuck.

Yeah it’s a good opportunity for both of us, but it needs to make sense.


The other thing is, I’m not talking about a whole lot of shitty (UNDECIPHERABLE). The whole idea is out the window and it’s not about a quality product. The last boat never got out of port.


If you hire a disabled person so you get a huge tax credit.

How does that work?

It’s public. If you employ someone slow you get “X” amount of money.


What vehicle is he going to drive?

We could buy a truck for $1500 or a trailer, but he doesn’t have the vehicle to pull a trailer.

Yeah he does.

But not the weight you’re talking about. Not with all that ice and fish.

It’s just an idea.


Afterword: Then the guys proceed to cold call New Seasons Market and ask to be connected to the seafood department. Nobody answers and one of the guys leaves a message asking if the manager is interesting in buying 100 pounds of fresh tuna. And in my head, telepathically to the seafood guy at New Seasons, I’m like, “NOOOO! Don’t do it!”


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